The Silent Marker

It stands as a reminder to those that still tread this Earth, or other planets for that matter. Gracefully, solid, silent. A finally reminder to the world that although the body may not live the spirt has started a new journey and their stone acts as the beginning marker; it also serves as a marker for those that live, to start on a new path without the person they love within their lives.

The Moon Cat approached his target slowly, stalking through the undergrowth of the garden that was in the secret Uranian Embassy on the moon. As he softly approached he could her the low, almost mumbling sound of song; the words were muffled and raspy.

"Go away." The voice was low, more pleading then commanding. The tone also drew the cat up short. He had only heard the voice a few times and when the woman before him was younger.

"Sakuya-san..." He started softly.

"Go away Apollo." Sakuya said, her long reddish-brown hair hiding her face. Knees pulled up to her chest and arms wrapped tightly around them.

Apollo's tail twitched slightly. Walking to sit beside her he glanced at her in the gloom. Her tone bothered him; it wasn't that she wanted to be left alone, that was understandable, but she sounded like she was pouting. A tone he hadn't heard in many years, not since he had first met her. Shaking his head slightly Apollo took a steadying breathe before saying, "Sakuya, come back. The others are worried."

There was no response coming. "Let them help." Apollo stated gently, "They care about you."

He noticed that she moved her head to look at him. Although her eyes were hidden, except for a vague impression of where they were, Apollo could feel them coldly glaring at him. "This doesn't concern them."

Apollo twitched his tail again, this time in slight irritation.

Arguing with Sakuya was a pain! "I know it's hard Sakuya, but..." He trailed off, unsure what to say. The silence stretched on before he said, "Can you tell me about it?"

"Victoria was right." Sakuya said softly while moving her head to stare straight ahead. She didn't notice the shocked expression on Apollo's features.

"Right about what?" Apollo asked after several seconds. For Sakuya to admit that Vicky was right was monumental! The tension between Younger Jupiter and Younger Venus was a constant theme; each one out to prove they were best, that they would win no matter what.

"I've been brain-washed into this crap." Sakuya said softly, it was difficult to admit. She wouldn't normally admit it but something deep within her was compelling her to. "I was a young girl, desperately seeking to get away from my problems. I ran away, picked up their dream... forgot the person I was."

Apollo snort this time, "`Forgot the person I was'?!? Sakuya, don't you listen to Victoria. If there's one thing I know, it's that you would never allow yourself to be drawn into something that YOU didn't want." Shifting slightly closer Apollo said, "You were young, yes; however Haruka and Michiru made mistakes. So they didn't handle your situation in the best way, but still you helped them learn!"

Sakuya shook her head slowly before saying, "You would say that Apollo. Your their advisor, someone they turn to for advice."

"Aren't I your friend?" Apollo questioned, he felt slightly hurt. Yes he had a special like with Jeanette and Haruka but he had always considered Sakuya a friend. She was abrasive but any other personality wouldn't suite her.

"No," Sakuya said. It was plaintive sounding in a way. Like someone finding out something bad was about to happen.

"Fine, then I'll advise!" Apollo snapped, "Let your heart open. Your won't be any good to anybody if you just keep this bottled up!"

Straightening suddenly Sakuya turned to face Apollo fully. The cat gulped, and stood before taking a step backwards. "This doesn't concern them, I'm not that vitally important to them. Or do you think that I have as big an ego as that scrawny necked tramp implies?!?" Her voice was now ragged, loud and demanding.

"Have you been drinking?!?" Apollo questioned while narrowing his eyes. Why hadn't he noticed it before? Well it was something to set aside for later consideration.

"Hai, so?" The sulky tone was back. Before Apollo could respond Sakuya continued to talk, "I'm so tired; tired of this place, of Vicky always trying to show me up..." her voice dropped low and dangerously quite, "of taking my family, just like Haruka and Michiru did."

Apollo was slightly confused, "Sakuya. Haruka and Michiru didn't take your family. You..." Then it suddenly dawned on him what she was talking about, "Oh Sakuya. Are you regretting giving her up?"

The strong shoulders slumped and the plaintive air was in Sakuya tone when she spoke. "She's gone Apollo; I will never meet her, hold her in my arms and explain to her why I had to... Why I ran away from a difficult situation." There was a pause before Sakuya continued, "These people don't need me. What do I provide? Jeanne is good at fighting. So's Fi for that matter. Miyuki is a strong magic-user." Although Apollo couldn't really see it, Sakuya seemed to smile slightly, "Vicky's pretty."

"What about you?" Apollo promoted, if Sakuya could realize her own worth it would be far better then if Apollo tried to convince her.

"Me?" Her voice was slightly surprised, "Why Apollo, I thought you knew! I'm that cold hearted bitch that deals in money and tries to squeeze everyone for every bit they got! I'm one who left her father, drove her mother away." Her voice fell, it's tone soft now, "Gave away her child to follow some dream. Blindly follow those that lead."

"I won't listen to your own self loathing." Apollo said and started to turn away. He hadn't gone but a few steps when her voice stopped him.

"Am I wrong though Apollo? Where is this dream? I could have raised my child. I could have shown her love that I never got except from the one person I left to chase this dream."

"The dream's in our hearts, minds and souls." Apollo said, turning back he continued, "Don't blame yourself or Haruka and Michiru. What life would your child lead here? What about the others? Jeanne is a sister to you, she looks to you for support. You taught her math when she could read; something that Michiru or Haruka could never do. So you can't fight the best, you're not a magic user, you're not multi-talented like Victoria. You ARE Younger Jupiter. Before you came Michiru handle most if not all of the financial matters. You proved that you could be trusted and have taken on a lot of responsibility, you've made us money! Something we need."

Walking back over he looked up into the child's face. For compared to him and most of the immortals in Crystal Tokyo that's what Sakuya was. "Your a tactician, someone that I can play chess with."

"Then why do I feel so hollow?"

"Sakuya, sometimes mothers have a longing to see the child they gave birth to and then gave up; it's a natural desire. But you were young and I think maybe a little embarrassed so you buried the memory deep within you." Sakuya shifted nervously but didn't respond. After a few minutes Apollo said, "You had a special relationship. You couldn't see her, but you watched her grow from a far. You could handle that..."

"When I got that letter, it was like I died a little." Sakuya lowered her head and covering her face said almost to softly to hear, "I have to say good bye again. This time, from afar."

"Talk to one of the others, they can help you." Apollo stated gently.

"I can't, this is something that I need to work out alone." She reached out and gave Apollo a gentle scratch between the ears.

"You aren't alone, you know that?" Apollo asked with slight exasperation.

"Hai." Sensing that there was little else he could say, Apollo moved off into the darkness. A little relieved, little worried but confident that Sakuya would seek out support when she wanted it.

[What the hell am I doing here?] Sakuya thought as she leaned against the steering wheel. Looking out into the rain of the graveyard. The grey clouds hung low in the sky while a cold drizzle of rain came down. Not enough so that it could be considered truly raining, just enough to soak everything in touched.

Opening the car door Sakuya pushed her umbrella out and opened it. With long practice she swept from the car, avoiding the water that tried to soak her; shutting the car door she locked it and set the alarm before making her way down the rows.

Again she asked herself, [What am I doing her?] And the simple answer that came did not satisfy her, [Saying goodbye.] She didn't want to say goodbye though, she wanted to hug a living breathing person to her, hug the daughter she gave up, and try to explain. it was through sheer force of will that Sakuya continued on and ti was five minutes before she found the proper headstone.

She tried to call up the face of her daughter. Tried to picture the face she had scene within newspaper articles and those she had acquired through other means. All she could draw up though was the picture of that tiny face, those eyes that looked at her with something like calm absolute trust. The small thatch of hair upon her head, the soft and steady rhythm of her breathing.

She did not know how long she stood like that, just looking at the headstone, trying to desperately remember a daughter she had had to push away before a burst of tears finally came.

[I'm so sorry Sayoko,] Sakuya thought, [Kami-sama knows I would have kept you if things had been different. I was young then, pig-headed and baka.] "I love you," she whispered out, it had been so long since she had said those three words.

The voice that came startled her, "Did you know Obaa-san?" Sakuya whirled around aggressively. Her visage made the youth step back, "I'm sorry that I interrupted you, gomen nansai, I'll return."

"Iie," Sakuya said, calming and flushing at the same time, "Gomen." After wiping her eyes Sakuya looked towards the youth. Her was tall and willow like. Piercing green eyes flashed both curiosity and wariness as he studied Sakuya. She was surprise to see that he was sporting a close-cropped head of black hair.

"Did you know Obaa-san?" he questioned again, while shucking up the overly long sleeves of his jacket so he could ram his hands into his jean pockets.

[The Artful Dodger...] Sakuya thought, [Her looks like that character out of that really old book.] She resisted the urge to giggle but did smile at him. "Hai, but only through the news papers and a very brief meeting once." To Sakuya's heart that sounds so cold and callous, and not for the first time she wondered how the others had ever stayed friends with her. "My name is Rakurai Sakuya." She bowed, noting with some disapproval that his boots were laced up crookedly and they seemed to be worn and tattered.

"Gomen, pardon my manners, I am Tetsuko Senji."

Sakuya took a sip of her tea, wonder yet again how things had progressed from a graveyard to a little sidewalk shop that sold tea and small snacks. She supposed that it was her fault.

Noting the time Sakuya groaned slightly and said, "I have kept you away from what you intended on doing. I should have burrowed into your personal life with questions about your sobo."

Senji who had been grinning took on a serious expression. "I enjoyed it Rakurai-san." lowering his head slightly he said in a quieter tone, "my parents don't like to talk much, they say it hurts them too deeply. Obaa-san was my best friend really." He licked his lips and said, "I... I was there when she died. I didn't want her to die alone. My parents had left to get some rest, they had been with her all night."

"And you feel responsible?" Sakuya questioned.

"Empty," he replied after a long silence, "I try and think of all the fun Obaa-san was but it hurts."

"I don't think the pain will ever go away," Sakuya replied more to herself then Senji, "But it will lessen with time. Pushing herself from her seat Sakuya said, "I do need to go. I appreciate all the help you've been. Domo Arigato."

Senji rose and bowed again. he stood there watching Sakuya walk off and then something occurred to him, "Rakurai-san," he called after Sakuya who stopped to face him, "I think if Obaa-san considered you a friend, then you have to be a good person." Giving an impish grin then he turned and started walking away. Sakuya stared after him and for the pain and guilt she felt lessened slightly for she was reassured that what she had done had been her best option, for both her daughter and her happiness.

The end